Basement Blogger
Rebekah Stottlemyer

September 23, 2009, at 12:25 pm
I’ve finally met her!!!!
I met the most wonderful girl yesterday! She’s perfect, her name is Jessie. I haven’t met her in person, but we’ve been IMing all day yesterday. We have so much in common. She loves playing WoW …she’s my dream girl! I can’t wait to tell my guild buddies about her. They’ve been razzing me lately about not having a girlfriend and now I can finally tell them I have one! This will show them, they will eat their words. I’ve finally found my other half.
My mother just interrupted me, I mean how rude. This is my room, she should knock! I don’t care if it is the laundry room or if it’s her basement too. This is my room! How rude, get out! Knock, if you want to come in.

September 28, 2009, at 9:15 pm
Jessie sent me a picture today. Oh she’s so beautiful. I want to talk to her over video chat on skype, but she’s being too shy. She won’t even talk on vent either. She says it makes her nervous. I don’t want to make her nervous so that’s OK with me. We’ll go on chatting on our own private channel, playing WoW, running through the Burning Steppes, killing drakes as we spend time together, IMing each other for hours. She’s the most perfect person I know. I can’t wait until I finally meet her!
My guild buddies tell me that there are no girls on the internet and that Jessie can’t be an actual girl, but I know she is. She’s perfect for me. They are just mad because I’m leveling faster then them, hahahaha.

October 4, 2009, at 12:39 pm
Why don’t my parents understand me?
My mother barged in on me again, why doesn’t she get the picture? Hello, this is my room and I think she should respect that. Why is everything so difficult? Why can’t she just knock? Her excuse is that she thought I should be gone out by now and doing something. Whatever, I am doing something. Can’t she tell I was writing a letter to my lovely lady, and she interrupted me. I don’t get any respect around here. My father is always like, “Tim, you’re twenty-seven years old. You need to get a job and move out.” Um, I have a paper route so I have a job, it pays for everything I want, WoW. So I don’t know why he’s complaining. He doesn’t even go into the basement, he doesn’t need it for anything. I don’t know why he wants me to leave.
My mother on the other hand wants me to go to college. I have a job! I don’t need anything else claiming my time! If I went to college then I wouldn’t have any leftover time to do anything. I just can’t do it. I need all my time right now to spend with my love. And of course playing WoW, that takes up all the time I have in the world. Gotta go, raid time!

October 7, 2009, at 2:45 pm
I tried setting up a meeting today with Jessie. I mean we’ve been going out for two weeks now, I want to meet her. But she said that she is still not sure about us. Whatever. Why won’t she meet me? I’ll go to where she is or she can come here, whatever makes her more comfortable. Why won’t she come?
I’d even settle for talking to her on video chat on skype, or a chat on vent! But she still won’t talk to me on it. Maybe she doesn’t love me. I love her, why won’t she love me back? Why won’t she let me just talk to her? I hate my life. I just want it to end. If I can’t have her then there is no point any more. I’ve got to make her see this. I’ve got to make her see that we belong together.

October 8, 2009, at 1:44 pm
Jessie said she would think about it! She loves me. I know she does because she’s going to think about it! Everything is turning out right. We’ll meet, get married, have the perfect life. We’re made for one another.
Gotta go! I’ve got a raid team to keep alive, I’m the only one my guild ever comes to because they need me: I am their tank, they wouldn’t survive w/out me.

October 10, 2009, at 3:30 pm
She’s putting me off! She’s driving me insane. Why’s she doing this? Why can’t we just be together? I’d love to have just a sound byte of her voice. Why won’t she give me something? Anything?
She’s cheating on me! That has to be it. That’s it, I can’t take it this anymore. I can’t go on. I’ve got to kill myself, she doesn’t care about me!
I’ve got no reason to go on. I just wanna die. I hate, HATE my life.

October 11, 2009, at 4:15 pm
Coming, Coming!
Jessie’s coming to see me!!! Oh, YES! We’ll finally be together, my life has meaning. She is coming, I am so excited!!! I just can’t wait. She said that she would be coming in on a train. I was like, why a train? An airplane would be so much faster. Why would she want to take something that would take so long. My guild buddies are telling me that she is just putting me off, that if she really wanted to come then she would take the fastest way possible. I won’t let them get to me because she’s coming. YES.

October 15, 2009, at 10:22 am
To pay or not to pay?
She’s gonna be here tomorrow, what should I do? Should I con my dad into taking me to go pick her up or should I shell out some cash for a cab? The other option I have is I could ride my bike there . . . nah that is way too much work. I will try and con my dad into taking me to pick her up. I just can’t wait! Everyone wish me luck, and yes that includes you, Mikey and Spoon. I know that my guild buddies really want me to succeed. Even if they keep insisting that Jesse’s a guy.

October 16, 2009, at 2:34 pm
WHAT IS GOING ON??? I thought that we’d be so perfect together. I thought that we’d be together forever. But when she came off that train she . . . she . . . she was not a she. Dude, she’s a dude. This is why she . . . he never video chatted with me on skype. This was why she . . . he never talked to me on vent. It was BECAUSE she was a HE!!!!!!!!! My perfect life . . . gone . . . like smoke on a breeze. I just wanna die. My guild mates were right, there are no girls on the internet, just guys. I AM NEVER going to get a girlfriend! I’ll never meet anyone who is not on the internet. I’ll ALWAYS be alone. I should just go and throw myself off a bridge, jump off a tall building. No one cares, no one loves me, that guy was just . . . just . . . I hate him, how could he do this to me? I wanted my perfect mate, my perfect wife. There is nothing left for me . . . I think I’ll go tell my guild buddies goodbye because I just can’t go on. Oh, Jessie, if only you were real.

October 16, 2009, 4:02 pm
. . .
I’ve decided I’m too important to die over something as trivial as a fake girl. I mean too much to my guild members. If I died then they would have to find another tank to go on their raids with them and everyone knows how hard it is to find a good tank these days. I am just too important to let Jessie get to me.
I sent that poor excuse of a girlfriend a note telling her . . . him exactly what I thought about her, I mean him. That if I ever saw her . . . him again on WoW I would kill her . . . him! Oh damn, I called him a her throughout the email. Who cares! HE will get the message. HE will rue the day he made me look like a fool! His life on WoW will be at an END!!! I am going to get my guild to go after him!
My mom is calling me upstairs, she just will not let me have a moment to myself.

October 16, 2009, at 4:30 pm
Those %#*@!! . . . I am going to kill my guild members. How could they do this to me? They are going to rue the day they . . . they played this awful trick on me. Do you want to hear what they did to me? My mom’s interruption was about Jessie . . . the real Jessie. She showed up and called me out on that note I sent her after meeting that guy at the train station. She called me a jerk and said she had come all this way to meet me just to have me send her a shitty note telling her off. She told me that she never wants to hear from me again, that she was blocking me from her accounts and joining another server . . . then she left.
My freakin guild members hired a guy to pose as Jessie because they thought it would be funny. Did they tell me that they played a trick on me after they saw how upset I was? Noooo. They just went ahead and let the joke go on, letting me send that note to her. There was a real girl on the internet and they made me lose her!
Oh, those guys are so going to pay for this. I’m getting first dibs on raid treasures for months because of this.