“A” Paper
Gregg Gunsch
(Sung to the tune of "White Christmas")

I'm dreaming of an “A” paper
That would be something mighty strange
With legitimate data
Supported conclusions
And written in English, for a change

I'm dreaming of an “A” paper
Of which the parents could be proud
One I would not mind reading out loud . . .  
Oh, oh, where can such a pa-per be found?